Every now and again I take to my Facebook page to rant about things and people that tick me off. It’s very cathartic to release negative energy and as such I’ve decided that whenever a Facebook status I’ve written applies to life after I’ve posted it, I will make it a blog post.
Enter the first installment: Selective Memory AKA Being a F@ck Faced Bastard
Do you suffer from forgetting every time a person helped you, went out of their way for you and was always in your corner? Do you only remember the times when a person couldn’t help you simply because they didn’t have the means? If so you may be suffering from Selective Memory, more commonly known as being a Fuck Faced Bastard.
Common symptoms include: forgetting how far a person stretched themselves to help you while they were struggling, random fits of telling people who were there as much as they could be that they never were there at all, and bitching about how much people didn’t do for you while you wear clothes they bought for you, use electronics they purchased for you etc.
Side effects to having Selective Memory aka being a Fuck Faced Bastard include losing people who did for you and dick breath. Doctors recommend that people suffering from Selective Memory take the prescription written for their condition, bend over, spread their cheeks and violently shove it up their ass!
This message sponsored partly by Americans Against Fuck Faced Bastards and people like you who don’t take people’s kindness for granted. And now back to your regularly scheduled programming, already in progress….
And for your viewing and listening pleasure “Cut You Off” by Kendrick Lamar: